Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Nite report

Trooper stayed asleep until Princess had an in the middle of the night crying. She does this if she has to go potty or dream that wakes her. Jedi then fed Trooper 2 oz and Trooper drank it all down correctly, but would not let Jedi even hold the bottle. Remember, he had been mostly chewing on the bottle or letting it drip everywhere. He then went back to sleep until 5am when Jedi got up for work. He then cried on me until he finally gave up after an hour of his new cry. I hate this cry. I am trying not to cry during but it is so hard, So I figure a quiet cry is ok and at least better than the full blown ugly cry for him to see.

Sorry if this offends you, wait, not really, I am sticking up for the babies and toddlers. But I really have no sympathy for those who leave a baby to cry it out and/or wean them without a dire reason ie cancer. So this why I can't go to LLL mtgs anymore. I used to be against cry it out and early weaning but could still understand where the mom/dad was coming from on why they wanted to do it--go back to, need more sleep, don't like a moving baby in bed with them or a baby that is nursing all night. I remember understanding and having those feelings. But now I say suck it up parents. You are the adult you can handle it--hey, if people can deal with cancer you can deal with this small in comparison annoyance. They are babies!

So after doing this to my baby, I can't understand people who do this on purpose. So there is no way for me to be a Leader at the LLL mtg and be all nice and understanding about it. Maybe I can come and just be a mom, they can say anything, though the Leaders would hate me for it.

For now I sit in the rocking chair with him as he cries. I wish I could put him the sling but it hurts my port.

I hate cancer, now I hate it even more. Cancer has been so horrible to me and will continue to do worse to me and will probably be what kills me. But does it have to hurt my kids, husband, family, and friends to? Yep, it does, no wonder there is all these cancer websites and posts saying fu cancer.

1 comment:

  1. Kim Ann,
    I love reading your updates. Please keep them coming. My grandmothers went through cancer treatment when I was real young so I never really experienced it with them. This is my first time with such a close friend or relative. Thanks for taking us on your journey. We are on the rollercoaster ride with you and won't get off until the ride's over! You keep smiling. We'll keep praying. And Trooper will love his 'new' intimate moments with you and know that you are protecting him. We'll talk about LLL later. Know that you are still impacting people away from the meeting - now I can't even think about stopping Aaron before he decides he wants to stop nursing. We're here for you, Kim Ann. Stay strong!