Monday, August 23, 2010

We already talked about that

How well do you think it would go over with a new mom if I told her "I already talked to you about how to increase supply (or wean a baby, how to latch etc). " "We already talked about this, we don't need to talk about it again." Yeah, how long would it take for people not to want to call me for help? How would that mom feel? For the record I would never tell a mom that. I know when a mom talks with me it is often important to go over things again especially when she calls me back since when she first called she was in a different mindset than when she calls back the second or third time.

Well, that is what my chemo dr said to me when I asked questions. "I already told you, we already talked about this." I even had to point out I was in a different mindset when we talked before and I need to go over the info again so I can absorb it and make decisions. That didn't matter to him. In general, I haven't been happy with any of the cancer drs I have met. They must be numb to this. This is no big deal to them, I am just a number, they just want me to shut up and do whatever they say and don't question and don't ask the hard questions or repeat questions. They don't even tell you the side effects and when they do they down play it. I guess they don't have to tell you about the very bad (death causing) side effects because it doesn't matter, you have cancer and that causes death so so what if the drug can cause the same thing.

I am paying you dr so answer my questions, tell me things! Yet they don't get that or don't care since there will always be another cancer patient to take my place.


  1. I so want to send you a huge hug because I relate completely to the frustration in your post above.

    However, you are NOT a number, you must not shut up and you must bug and bug them until you get your answers.

    Someone said to me recently 'Some doctors like to treat the cancer and forget about the patient' very true.

    Keep questioning, keep being annoying and make them earn their money
    Big hugs to you and a huge kick up the arse to them :-)
    Carole xxx

  2. I am so so sorry your docs are not being helpful! That really ticks me off for so many reasons. And you know what, you are RIGHT. You are PAYING them. You are a consumer. If you feel you're not getting the care you want and deserve, don't be afraid to switch doctors. And for sure keep asking questions!

  3. Unfortunately I have found that to be true of most MD's in general not just oncologist! Sad really! To them the patient is just a paycheck. I kept at breastfeeding my son even though many times I desperately wanted to stop and I am breastfeeding my new baby girl more passionately because of your teaching, help, and example! Thank you for all you have done to help Mom's everywhere! I wished I still lived in the Quad cities so I could be more of a help to you now, in the mean time I pray earnestly for you and your family! If there ever is anything I can do for you from a distance, please email me!