Tuesday, August 17, 2010

I am just doing this

I am not strong. I am only doing this. Just putting up with this crap. Talked to a friend who is strong and going through something even worse than this. Unless she is like me, I just look strong to others, I just look like I am coping so great with this. Someone told me I was coping so great. I am not, but do I tell them that. I just avoiding replying to that comment because I hate hate lying.

Jedi went to pick up my meds and pudding. He took forever! The ac is leaking so has to be turned off, the kids spilled water on the carpet, the kids won't go to sleep and school tomorrow. I feel like you know what. And Jedi leaves without any kids for a hour and half. For me to deal with it all. Well I guess he needs his time since lucky me got to go by myself and do chemo for 6 hrs. Not said in a good tone in my mind.

He's now home folding laundry. That is helpful said with a loving tone in my mind.

Off to sleep without Trooper tonight, too sick. My hands hurt from typing.

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